Everything in your body is driven by tiny vibrating electrons. Invisible! And THEY control your body. They force you to eat that third piece of pie, give people the finger, max out your credit card.
You ask, “What can I do about these invisible uncontrollable frequencies that are ruining my life?????” First,our trained practitioners will study YOUR particular brain. We hand-craft a set of 3 tuning forks in pure surgical plastic and a singing bowl to be worn daily. They create new frequencies, and shift your brain to a new state of consciousness. You will automatically start doing the right things, naturally. You will be thin, beautiful, focused, kind, attentive, a good listener, etc. WITH NO EFFORT!
Wow, this is amazing. Can I really connect with 4 Armenian deities via 3 tuning forks? This is calculated for max effect. Makes me think about antlers, no wonder gazelles and antelopes are so graceful. They're cosmically tuned in! This hairdo could give magic a good name.
ReplyDeleteThis is so amazing. I have been accused of all sorts of things, and now I see that it was not my fault. I can get the tuning forks, singing bowl, and a NEW ME.
ReplyDeleteThat's right, hon. A new,skinny, model-like, buddha-like you. All with just a hairstyle. Others have to get cerebral transplants, using either a surgical quality synthetic brain, or find a donor.
ReplyDeleteAre you sure that this hairstyle is better than the surgical quality synthetic brain transplant?
ReplyDeleteWell, it is really difficult to find a brain donor these days. Then, of course, you want a high quality brain, too. Very very difficult.
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